|The nondescript Venezuelan Poodle Moth The Flannel Moth pussy caterpillar, Megalopyge opercularis|
The answer may lie in the reluctance of Capitol Hill time-servers to reject nominees who strongly resemble those who hold the highest offices in the land. In the President's case, this makes for a very short list. Fortunately, nature has provided the means for the administration to extend it beyond Alec Baldwin, by turning to biodiversity for new species of nominees.
Besides the Venezuelan Poodle Moth's uncanny phenotypic resemblence to the Vice President, it is easily captured, as it is irresistably drawn to tiki torches. As is that MAGA hat-worthy Megalopygid, the Flannel Moth Pussy Caterpillar, the spitting image of our Chief Executive's hair, both at rest, and in motion:
Both of these tropical species are marching North towards the District of Columbia in lock step with rising global temperatures, and may be expected to follow in the footsteps of the prickly pear cacti that colonized NewYork Harbor in the 1950's. Once there, they will soon be enfranchised to vote for Mayor Deblasio like all the other immigrants before them. It but remains for the Senate to prepare for that contingency by appointing these remarkable creatures as Acting Deputy Assistant Undersecretaries before their relatives arrive.